What's he got that I don't got?!

This morning Meera let me snuggle her! She didn't purr for me, but she didn't struggle either! I just picked her up, and scratched her around her cheeks. She squeezed her eyes shut...

Then later, she and Kai were lying on the big blue chair, grooming each other for long minutes, and snuggling to beat the band.

G-R-O-S-S

Note to self: run the disposal after throwing the ends of pickles into the sink drain. It took me a good ten minutes of crouched staring, and poking with paper towel, before I could identify the rubbery pale green thing left outside my bedroom door.

Kai must have reached into the drain and snagged it with his claws. How did he know it was down there??

Visitor

Last night, returning from a visit to my sister's place (oh, to be a real adult with a fireplace!), I climbed the porch and walked toward my back door. A streak of fuzzy black lightning flew past my feet, down the steps, and vanished into the alley behind the old carriage house.

Meerakai are always terribly interested in sniffing my shoes when I come home. I guess it's their window to the outside world. What do they smell? Maybe where I work, the sidewalks outside the house, the gas pedal of my car...the scent of neighborhood kitties??

The blue light

Singing a song of Saturday morning

This morning has been a steady string of quiet, simple joys. I woke early, made the bed and took care of the kitties. Put away the breakfast dishes and started a pot of coffee. Kicked the thermostat up a degree or two. Last night I'd cleaned the flat...giving the bathroom a thorough going-over, washing three days' worth of dishes, and sweeping the kitchen floor. It was so pleasant to wake up to a clean house. Time was, I resented the connection between my sense of well-being and the cleanliness of my surroundings, but now I accept it and do what I must.

With fresh coffee perking and two cats twisting themselves around my ankles, I made and enjoyed a leisurely breakfast...toast, coffee, water, and some vegetable soup. Vegetable soup?! Not the most orthodox of early morning meals, but that's what happens when Mother Hubbard's cupboards go bare!

So then I brought a second cup of coffee over to the armchair in the living room, where I alternated reading with gazing through the window just to my left. Lately it seems as though the sky over Hamtramck is always grey and overcast, though not oppressively so. I don't mind it. I find something very appealing in the combination of old crooked houses, black bare-branched trees, and low sky. It makes me feel like I'm a character inside one of the wonderfully-illustrated books I read as a girl (Edward Gorey? Royal Tenenbaums? Madeleine?).

Just now Kai and Meera, perched atop the low bookcase in front of the window, began making 'yik yikking' sounds. I stood up to see what might be causing the fuss. Both their tails were swishing wildly back and forth; their bodies were tense, and their ears pointed forward. Just outside the window grows a tree, bare of course, bare except for the extremely fat squirrel running back and forth on a branch at about our eye level. Kai stood on his hind legs to paw at the window. The squirrel must have heard the scritching because all of a sudden he stopped mid-stride, and stared for a good three seconds at our window (what a sight that must have been! two eager-eyed kittens and their lady, scrunched together on the other side of the glass!). Kai pawed again at the window, and the squirrel ran up and over to a higher, safer part of the tree. He stared again for a few seconds, and then decided the kittens were no threat, trapped as they were in their domestic prison. He leaped to the branch closest to our window, balanced his substantial weight on his back legs, and proceeded to take a leisurely bath. First he licked his front paws, then washed his nose, his ears, groomed his belly (not unlike a cat, I'd like to point out). He went over his entire bushy tail, and finally gave a good scratch to each ear before bounding off in search of nuts. I thought the kittens were going to go insane...

I feel content and relaxed right now, fully caffeinated, kittenated, and ready for the day. If only every day began with such simple satisfaction, with such little rush. Before I leave for my last Saturday class, I'll finish a load of laundry, pack an overnight bag to take to my grandmother's, and find my waitressing outfit for work tonight.

Artsy bed-shot

Sit like a lady! (my mother would say)

Ah, but this wee one has just woken up and didn't know there was a camera about...give her a moment to adjust herself...

Meera breaks her own personal-space rule

This paper is NOT being co-authored

I finished my dinner a few minutes ago and just sat back down at my laptop. My goal is to finish this research proposal by 2 am. It's 8 pm now. This is the very last ever-ever project I'll have to do before they hand me my degree, and I'm so sick of it I could cry. Luckily the bulk of it is done. I need to make a few revisions, rearrange some sections, and then make it all flow.

But I've just glanced at the laptop screen, and my stomach dropped. Nothing I saw looked familiar. There was an entire paragraph containing a single letter: 's'. There were dots and dashes, there were nonsensical words.

Oh, shit, I though. I forgot the first rule of working on a laptop: never leave it unattended and unprotected while there are catses around. The blinking cursor must have caught Kai's eye, so he stepped on the keyboard to do a little investigative sniffing. And that explains the scratch marks on the display, too.

I started clicking the Undo button repeatedly. 125 Undo's later, as my finger was starting to tire, I discovered a handy-dandy Word feature that lets me Undo several things at once (about 500 things at once, to be exact).

I was able to delete all of Kai's editorial comments, and retrieved entire paragraphs that he'd erased. Then I saved the proposal three times.

Haven't seen the little bugger in awhile. Meera is in the room with me now, jumping straight up the wall at absolutely nothing. Looks like she can clear about two feet of air...

Squirt, squirt

I went and bought a squirt bottle from the supermarket just down the street. It was definitely a premeditated decision, and they know it. I wrote it on my shopping list. I remembered to go down the cleaning/storage aisle. I found one that lets me spray a soft befuddling mist and a long-range hard-hitting kerpow.

So yes, I can eat my breakfast without having to push Bella (aka "Greedy") away from my plate twenty million times, and now Kai (aka "Slurpy") actually jumps out of the kitchen sink when I say "get down!"

But is it worth the guilt??

I'm going to be one of those parents whose kids are miserable brats because I don't have the heart to discipline them...sigh...

Tempting fate

Meerakai were both sitting peaceful and sedate in the living room window as I locked up this morning. But I bet Kai found the pan soaking in the kitchen sink within seconds of my shutting the door.

Bobblehead

This morning, I walked from the fluorescent brightness of the kitchen into the barely lamp-lit darkness of the living room. Meera, sitting on the long end table and craning her neck to see out the window, suddenly stood stock-still and got ready to run--normal procedure for her when I enter the room.

So, obligingly, I slowed way down, and channeled soft, non-threatening, fluid thoughts towards this tiny wildchild. She remained on the coffee table. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched her do something strange as I passed through to the bedroom. She kept her body stiff and her eyes on my face, but her head bobbed up and down and all around as I went by, tiny little bird-like movements.

I've noticed her doing this before, but never really consciously until this morning. Why the bobblehead?

Leap to balance

Prey! (near-headless, ratty, germed-up prey)

Hungry for the sea

Why were they crying so loudly? Neither are especially vocal, but this afternoon they cried and cried and swam among my legs, and beseeched me for...something!

I gave each a rub on the head, and went back to stirring my New England Clam Chowder.

What's so cool about sheets?

My bedroom door doesn't latch properly; the pokey-outey thing is permanently stuck inside the door, so it won't grab the hole-thing on the jamb. ("Jamb"? Is that a word??). Thus at night when I want to sleep a sleep free of stealth toe attacks, I prop the door shut with a shoebox full of books.

Normally I use the shoebox during morning bed-make as well. But this morning I could hear both kittens munching loudly on kitten chow, waaay on the other side of the flat, and thought to myself, "It takes, what? less than a minute to make the bed? I'll just rearrange the sheets and blankets real quick."

I threw back the top blanket. I threw back the comforter. I picked up the sheet. I tossed it high into the air and let it billow slowly, slowly, slowly down. In its settling, two cat-shaped humps revealed themselves. How in the...?!?! Weren't they just...?!?! But...?!?!

I gave up on the bed-make, and instead Kai and Bella and I had crazy insane playtime. Pupils black and dilated, they stalked each other among the mountains and valleys of the Sheet Monster.

My Bella knows she's bella

One of the many, many wonderful features of my new flat is that both of the walk-in closets have full-length mirrors for doors. At the old place, I had to crane my neck to see my whole ensemble in the tiny bathroom mirror, or I'd try to catch my reflection in the glass of the back door as I locked up for the day.

This morning before I left the flat I called for the kitties. Only soft Kai came running, so after giving him a little belly rub I went in search of Meera. Not in the kitchen, not in the office/library/yet-to-be-unpacked room, not in the living room or in any of the windows. Finally I found her parked in front of the closet mirror in my bedroom. Sitting on her hind legs, front paws positioned daintily just-so, admiring her own reflection. And what a beautiful reflection it is...

Kittens already feel at home; 154 boxes unpacked, 3 to go

Zipping up

In particular, I miss the way they hear the first creak as I start up the stairs, and go bounding past me to arrive at the top first. As they zip by, I think: "...there's one!...and there's two!..."

From Albuquerque...

From hundreds of miles away, I hear that one of the two has been sick, and that Meera has come out of hiding and wants to be pet...

I miss their company.

2 glorious hours...

...in which to slowly wake up, sipping my tea and reading my book...

...were not to be.

Spills in the foster room, a water dish that desperately needed cleaning, unpotted dirt all over the living room floor. Turns out tin foil around the base of a plant isn't as effective as a kitten mistress could hope. At least, not with these two.

Kittens say, wake up earlier, fool!

She's dreaming jungly stripéd dreams

Use #345,607 for a kitty webcam

Mornings, I find holes in the ultra-thick, ultra-ugly brown living room curtains. Tiny pinprick holes, the size of, hmmmm, kitten claws...

But I never see them attack the curtains. Innocent until proven guilty, they say.

Infrequent guest

Our Buddy-like buddy hasn't been back in awhile, and we think maybe four cats is too much for him to handle. Two he could talk to, three was a bit much, but four? Well, now that's just going too far.

KP

Breakfast time. Defense time. Scan the counters, scan the floor, great distraction needed, gotta protect the food. String? Old. Dead leaf? Wouldn't last a minute. Aha! Bottlecap! Will this work?

I toss it.

Meerakai go bounding off, two tails and eight legs, 36 whiskers and who-knows-how-many stripes, I'm left alone in the kitchen.

Success is sweet; breakfast is mine, all MINE!

Linen impressions

Limp as a ragdoll

Distraction! Distraction! Distraction!

This morning at breakfast I had an especially hard time defending my food. I like to think that I don't ingest that many cat hairs, but who am I kidding, really? Still, I'm vigilant about protecting the six-inch circumference around my food.

I fix my breakfast on the counter, where no kitten has yet been caught. When all the elements are ready...plate, glass of water, mug o' tea, silverware...I juggle them all at once over to the kitchen table.

If, for whatever reason, I have to leave the kitchen, I pick everything up off the table and set it on the counter, then bring it all back once I return. Even if I just get up from the table to grab a forgotten napkin, I'll keep one eye upon my food. You wouldn't believe how fast kittens operate. Or maybe you would.

But just because I'm there, present, in front of my food, does not mean it's safe from kitten paw and kitten tooth. There's a certain arrangement of my plate and cups that I find especially helpful. Plate right on the edge of the table, directly in front of me. Water and tea both to the left of the plate, also on the edge of the table. Elbows out, left hand holding ever-present book, circling food and precious liquid and creating physical barrier. Right hand holding utensil or bagel or whatever... This right side is the weakest side. Ample opportunity for watchful kitten to sneak in and poke around.

This morning I had grapes. I think Meera can smell grapes from all the way across the house. Maybe this is partly my fault. I've been known to toss them through the air, all for the joy of watching kittens leap.

My table sits right in front of the window. Perfect, thinks Meera. I'll jump up on the 'forbidden' table. The lady will look up from her book with a stern expression, but I'll head right for the window and (this is crucial) sit down. She'll go back to her book. I'll listen for a page or two to turn, maybe she'll put down her bagel to take a sip of water...and that's when I'll make my move. I'll give a cute little mreow as I turn away from the window. I'll look her in the eye, as if what's out there can't really satisfy me; what I really want is some loving from her. How can she resist this? I'll sit real close to her right arm...I'll just sit...sit...sit. Ooooh, are those really grapes she's got on her plate?? So round, so plump, so tantalizingly bitable! Let me just reach out one paw and tap one. Just a quick feel, just to see if it squishes. Drat! She said the 'n' word!! Did she mean it? (Let me analyze the tone of her voice, how long she drew the word out, whether she looked at me or not...). Nope! She didn't mean it! So now let me just reach out and...

And so it goes. I had to sweep my Meerabelle off the table three times. Only now does it occur to me what I should have done...Distraction! Distraction! Distraction!

C3.5, or: The cat who thought he was a dog

When Kai is feeling especially loving, or just in need of some good pet, he looks up at me and gives a half-cry. A little ripply 'mreo.' So I look down at him; we make eye contact. Then he ducks his head and rolls onto his back. His back legs stiffen and stretch way out, he cranes his neck as far back as it'll go, and just begs me to rub his belly.

Too much catnip?

Wait! I don't give them catnip!!

Shocking Orange...

...But do we mean her eyes or that chair??

Thing #2 just being sweet

Thing #1 vs. The Great Height

Thing #1 vs. The Squirrel

Sorting out the visitors

I've got one hand to rub Thing #2's head, and one hand to rub Thing #1's. But is #1 satisfied? Nooooo....

He wants ALL the attention ALL to himself. He actually pitches fits to keep #2 from getting her share. He rolls onto his back and grabs for #2's neck. He hisses, he spits, he yowls. Do cats go through a Terrible Two phase??

Thank god I don't have to take him shopping or to get his hair cut...

So my concession to his needs: I sit in a chair with Thing #2 in my lap, and let one hand dangle over the edge for Thing #1, who, apparently, never looks up...

I know you're out there, I can see your feet!

Wednesday, August 23

The balance that a Libra loves

Thing #1

Thing #2

Let me introduce myself, fellas...

It's true: once you begin collecting, the collectees begin finding you

Sunday morning I had three cats. Sunday evening I was up to five, moving right past the Eccentric phase and straight into Cat-Lady phase. But these two are Temporary, I tell you! Temporary!

They were living in squalid conditions, unacceptable conditions, and so they were removed to my house. The alternative was the pound or the street. I have been in negotiations with their caretaker; the vet will be contacted, local friendly no-kill shelters will be contacted...within a week, we hope, we'll be able to say...

"...And then there were 3..."

I think we've seen this before...

Successful stealth toe-attacks during the night require lots of rest during the day

The one chair that should STAY slip-covered is always UN-slip-covered

Dreaming of Antarctica, popsicles, and snow angels...

Body art...this is Brat as Single Quotation Mark...do you see it?

Dreaming in blue

learning him

this evening as i typed, kai walked over and curled up in my lap. i wanted to give him a little special attention, so i stopped typing and rubbed the top of his head, lightly, using the tips of my fingers. but he ducked his head, so i stopped and tried something else. i reached beneath his chin and stroked the soft fur there...brat loves this. he'll extend his neck and push against my fingers, encouraging me to stroke harder. but kai had no reaction; instead he turned his face to the side, tucked his chin in.

in mild exasperation, i asked him aloud, "how do you like to be pet? i feel like i'm still learning you."

like driving a strange car for the first time, like learning a new lover, like moving to a new neighborhood,

you have to give yourself time to make mistakes. relish the strangeness of it. know that a week from now, or a month, or a year from now, there will be no questioning yourself. you'll know what to do and where to go. roughnesses will be rubbed smooth.

this learning, this exploration, is as much a source of joy as the sure knowledge that comes later.

i found kai's spot just now. it's that bare spot in front of his ears, with the full palm of my hand. he half-closes his eyelids; i see the white film from the corner of his eyes rise, and he holds very very still.

C3.4: the Trinity

Come home after a long day at the job(s). Immediately throw all bags on the floor, kick off shoes, remove sunglasses and dump keys on counter.

Take two steps away from the back door. Crouch. Listen for cats running down stairs, up stairs, off the couch, or off the (forbidden) table. Use forearms, hands, and elbows as you simultaneously pet a mass hello to your three babies...no one goes unloved at homecoming time.

Do they miss me, or are they just hungry? The cat-lady's eternal question. But push this aside...it's irrelevant, really...the cats and the human are each filling a need, and enjoying each other's company in the meantime. What more can you ask?

Afternoon snack

Meera tracked an ant today, from high up on a window of all places, all the way down to the living room floor...and across to the kitchen, back to the tile of the entranceway. She'd sniff it and sniff it, and bat at it. She'd watch until it almost made it under the chair, then roll him back out.

I watched for a very long time (who needs tv when there are CATS?), and reminded myself that this dance is part of the natural order...and that the ant was probably a bachelor ant who was getting too old to avoid rooms with cats...and that maybe he had already lost a leg or two before Meera found him...he was tired of hobbling around, no longer able to carry 30 times his own weight. Yes, he was ready to enter that ant-hill in the sky...

He's gone now.

C3 (Entry 3): the Handshake

Grip one tiny paw as if you were going to shake her hand, thumb resting on top of the paw, other fingers below. Use your thumb to gently stroke the paw, feeling the tiny bones within. Enjoy the moment; she won't still sit for this.

Cat Caress Codex (Entry 2): the Knead

With your cat standing sideways to you, visualize her back as a loaf of bread, and place your hands accordingly. Now knead.

The day after cherry-picking

If you stare long enough...

...you'll see the handle of a pair of scissors in the lines of his beautiful face. Start at the nose, loop up and around those eyes... Kind of a mundane image, but I'm having fun Highlights Magazine for Children flashbacks...

Flirting with danger...

...and making me verrry nervous! He walks the razor's edge above a steep flight of stairs...

Wanted: Red cape & SuperKitty costume

Robins in the front yard

Cat Caress Codex (Entry 1): the EarTug

Begin by cupping your hand around the back of the cat's head, thumb in front of one ear, four fingers behind. Gently rub, applying slight pressure & massaging the base of the ear. End by gripping the ear tightly, but pleasantly, and letting it slide through your fingers til you've reached the tip. Release.

Waiting his turn

she stands on the (forbidden (yeah right!)) table, tail arched, back arched, neck arched, as i lightly scratch the flat spot on top of her head.

this is the only move that makes her stand still. during every other kind of caress (is there a dictionary of cat caresses?) she twists herself in tireless circles.

as i scratch, she lifts her left paw and curls it, then lifts her right paw and curls, then her left again, and her right. kai strolls into the room, and she opens her eyes long enough to take his measure. kai watches for a moment, then flops in the middle of the kitchen floor.

My black shadow

I was home for hours this morning, and the kittens & cat made the most of it. Brat followed me around the house. Not only followed me, but anticipated my movements. In the kitchen, I moved from the freezer to the counter, and he walked all three feet with me. I moved from the counter to the table, and practically stepped on him. I moved from the table to the stove, and did step on him, but barely. I felt the soft fuzziness of a tail beneath my bare feet, and managed to lurch away before my full weight crunched down. Brat still cried out as if I'd actually stepped on him. Shameless bid for a head scratch?

Bug du jour

I yell, "BUG!" and it's first come, first serve...

This morning's offering was a leggy little morsel, about 1.5 inches long, nasty as hell. I opened the bathroom door on tiptoes and with shivery spine. Kai came racing in and knew just what to do. I found bits of leg scattered on the floor once the carnage was complete. Gross.

Illegal activity

Dancing on tables

Birds in the trees

Sharing the blue light

Inclusion policy

MeeraKai no longer keep it in the family. Or rather, they've expanded their definition of 'family.'

Brat has become one of their targets of random, unpredictable violence. Should I be alarmed, or should I convince the Old Man that it's a sign of acceptance, of comfortable familiarity? Silly lady, no convincing necessary...

This morning in the kitchen, Meera (5 pounds, wet) aimed a left hook at Brat (15 pounds, on an empty stomach). Keep in mind: Meera has finely honed the Art of Invisibility when it comes time to trim nails. And Brat...well, his former owner (we're trying not to pass judgement here) had him declawed. So you see the odds were not at all even. Add to this the fact that Meera moves like the wind (Brat can pass wind...does this count?). She's younger. And she's got that "You shouldn't hit a girl," thing going for her.

So I ran for my sweet old boy, prepared to soothe his ruffled fur, bolster his shattered ego, and wash and bandage any fresh wounds...

But wouldn't you know it? By the time I got there, Brat had swung his paw so hard at Meera's head that his other front paw actually lifted off the ground! While simultaneously hissing! And then he took a step in her direction! I think it was the step that did it. Meera fled, and Brat turned, victorious, full of the old glory, and creaked back to his dusty old chair.

Five...four...three...two...

Eye of Kai, eye of the dragon

Kai NOT posing for the camera

Off-screen kitten makes a face at Brat...there's fury in them there eyes...